Not Showing Up 

(From Feb. 15, 2015)

The Siamese dad came back, and looked as if nothing had happened. I pointed him out to Ali, asking if that was(n’t) him. (He was purposely run over.)

At a family gathering, I hit / punched Micalanne in the face, with all my strength, on two separate occasions, causing her to fall back and hit her head. 

Judy was passing a white paper for people to sign for someone’s birthday. Someone else gave it to me to sign. I was surprised that she would allow me to sign, since she’s upset with me. 

After the gathering, I was walking home, and about a block away, I started running. I was upset, saying that it can’t be that my mental capacity is handicapped. 

When arriving at the house (when I was an older teen), I stayed outside, sitting with some others, with the door to my right. 

Mom had brought back some leftover food. I wanted some of the desserts with some chocolate topping. Mom said that Becky (a friend) goes to an Italian church now, and took the chocolate topping with her, to take to work. 

There was a race to be held, and one of the starting points was in our front yard, going to the right, using the lane dividers as used for swimming. Barbie was going to participate, using a wheelchair, and commented how narrow the lanes are. 

(From Feb. 23, 2015)

It was getting dark. Ali had said he would come get me, but he wasn’t showing up, so I started to walk. As I was crossing a street, I was carrying chains (like Marley in The Christmas Carol with Ebenezer Scrooge), slowing down my progress. 

Ali, and I, are at a pregnancy clinic to see why I’m not pregnant yet. The technician(?) talks to us, with paperwork in hand, without taking us to the back (still in waiting area), and says, “Well, it’s here in your notes. You’re not pregnant because you’re not having sex.”

(Ali’s dream)

We were running through water, with lots of other people. I was in front, speeding. Ali was behind me. We were wearing shoes so that our feet wouldn’t get hurt / cut from the rocks. 



The side of the neighbor’s house was painted all green. I thought, “So, that’s why that man was here”, but as I kept looking, I saw that it hadn’t been painted yet , but was being prepared for painting. As I kept looking even more, I saw the whole side of his property, and Ali’s, were covered, were green. I then thought it was because their house was being tented, but if Ali’s side was covered also, then his house must also be tented. If that is so, why were we not told? I decided to go take a look outside.

I finally caught up with Travis. I had a knowing that he played sports, continuously, to stay in shape. He kissed me. I thought that maybe this was the reason why I shaved my pubic area, because I was going to get pregnant from him, and what that would imply, as I was also thinking about Ali. He then put his head to the side of mine, looking down. I was a little concerned he would feel the hairs, but he didn’t.

We then talked about how I had written him a message on the website My Life (Classmates, actually). And talked about that he had a swimming class in high school, and I kept sending notes to him, through Shannon, and that I never got a response from him. I had kept sending him notes, telling him that I didn’t think he was serious, during jr. high, of him wanting to be with me.

(From July 18, 2014)

I was writing stories involving animals(?).

(Ali’s dream)

We were on our way to a festival, and were close enough to hear the sounds, and smell the food, when I got a speeding ticket. There was a guy behind us who also got one. He was so upset, he threw a fit, throwing / jabbing his keys.

This upset me so much, that I decided we should go back home. I may have mentioned that a trapped emotion was the cause for me speeding.

Nervous to See

(From June 13, 2014 Time changed while writing)

(Night before, I asked, what am I to learn from my futuristic dreams.)

Tom is at the house, before his mission. I have a crush on him. He has now gone, and come back, and at the house.

Family are telling me he’s waiting for me. I am in the bathroom with Greg, and Amy, sitting on the edge of the tub. After they leave, I let out a “drop” into the tub. No one can really tell because there’s a bit of water, and suds, and it starts to liquify, and spread a little.

I go out, without makeup, and go close to the area where Tom is sitting at the table, waiting for food (?), but I don’t see him yet. There is a wall, with a slight opening, separating us. Mark is sitting in front of the opening, and we talk for couple minutes, laughing. He says my name loud enough for Tom to hear. I’m nervous he heard my name, but I haven’t shown myself yet. I look to where he is, but Mark is blocking my view of him.

My glasses are broke, so I’m wearing my glasses from my teens years, which are also broken, but I fixed them so I could use them. Someone (dad?) asks why I not wear the glasses, and I respond that my vision would then be blurry (nearsighted, and only time I’m conscious of the glasses). I am nervous to see him.

Valerie is at someone’s house to teach me about gluing (wrapping?) paper onto other paper, to make a flower. Her husband, and two young children, one a baby, are also there.

The baby is sitting on her husband’s lap, and I ask Valerie, double checking, if she was pregnant several years ago with the other one, at camp (week-long, during Summer, for teen girls from church). She says yes.

After awhile, Suzanne shows up, and I think the other is Brenda. (Ladies from church when I was a teen.)

At one point, Valerie starts having pain in her stomach. She is sitting on the floor, in front of me, to my left. She is facing sideways, so that her right arm is facing me. I know that she had had cancer before (only in dream, that I know of). Her family is gone from the room at this point.

I see Brenda’s husband walking along a street, coming to the house.

Suzanne asks me if I’m tired, and I say, no. I see that several of the flowers only have the middle part glued. I say, “oh”. She then gives me another wrapping paper instead of the one they are using to work with, but I don’t mind because it’s prettier.

I Found It Funny

(Night before, I asked if the angels of healing, etc… were real.)

Two older famous men, in a silent (home) movie, conversing with each other.

Ali, and I, are at a department store. We are where people come to pickup, or return. There is a huge sailing yacht, 1/4(?) size of actual, leaning on its left (when looking from front). It is in the middle of the floor, along with other things for sale.

There is a couple there, the man returning a model sized yacht. He has it in a flat manila envelope. I wonder how it could be in there. He puts some white packing tape across it, and places it on a pedestal, waiting for a worker to come service / help him.

He is conversing with another man (with a bit of Asian in him?), who is sitting, and says he bought this yacht for $119. Ali, who is standing by the outside doors, and I look at each other in amazement at that amount.

Ali says something about that if this man returns his yacht, Ali will give the money to the man sitting down. This man says that would be very kind of Ali to do that.

In the evening, there is a pregnant woman (4 – 5 months) running a short distance to catch the bus to take her a short distance. Someone mentions how she didn’t want to walk. The pregnant woman, tired, agrees.

I get picked up by this same woman(?) in her Lexus SUV. I am in the backseat, on the passenger side. A young man is in the front passenger seat. Ali doesn’t get in. As she drives away, I look back, wanting to say to her, “What about him?”, but then think that maybe he stayed because he had something else to do.

There is a tear in the leather at the top of the seat next to me. The lady mentions she wants to get a new vehicle. Something from outside, sharp, has reached inside, scraping across the leather, causing no damage, as she drives past (as if a branch had come in the window).

The lady says this street is usually the first to swindle (but another term) someone, but this time, it was ok.

There was a section of the road that dipped down, bending slightly to the left. I was thinking how it reminded me of the dream I had had where the road was steep, but we were going up.

Someone is talking about a computer program, for people who are looking for a job, that fills out all the information for you, on multiple forms, at once, allowing for the person to fill out multiples of applications.

As the speaker is ending, another scene starts showing several high school students cleaning inside a zoo enclosure, where the birds are, as one of their classes. They are wearing tank tops and shorts because it’s hot and steamy in there. There is a blonde girl, a guy, or two, and a black girl. The sweat is more visible on the skin of the black girl.

There are also firemen there and their truck. The firemen are teasing around with the blonde. She has soap on her left arm, using a big circular sponge to clean her arm, teasingly, because of the sweat. The black girl is raking(?) around a fountain that is in the middle of the enclosure.

A bare-chested guy lays down so that his knees are bent, taking someone’s place, seeing if that person will notice.

I am at my parent’s house, in their bed/bathroom. My parents want to use their car (I had been using it in waking life), so I told them I had left it at a storage/parking structure, and that I had left it unlocked. My dad said that Ali needs to know of all the cleaning, and fixing up, the car needs. I was thinking, besides the scratches that are there (from when he drove), there wasn’t much to clean/fix up.

As they went to get the car, I took a shower. The bathroom was huge, like the size of a hotel conference room, but rectangular in size. There was a window in the middle of the wall looking out to the street. There was a house/business across where people would be able to see in the bathroom. Before taking the shower, back against the other wall, I closed a huge curtain (hotel size, or perhaps theatre size), going from left to right, for privacy.

After taking the shower, I had needed to use the toilet, but this bathroom, because if its size, was also a public space. People would come, and go. A brother (only in the dream) even came to sit by the toilet to eat, facing toward the back wall.

There were several young guys coming over for an event at the house, parking their trucks where the closets (to the right of window) were. The closets were such that they were in a hallway behind a wall. I wondered how they were able to park there. I went over to take a look, and only saw a wide enough space for one person, as if it had originally been a bigger space but had been cut down to make more room for the rest of the bathroom. Seems also that there may have been a board leaning from/to (?) the left.

After seeing only this small space, and not seeing the vehicles, I then wondered where they were.

Across the street, at the house/business, an ambulance had arrived, with a female EMT. She was getting a gurney ready. Over on this side, someone started up the black SUV(?) that belonged to the person with the health issue. A couple other EMT’s arrived, and a mother and child related to the person called for, walked to the right. The people inside the bathroom hurried over to the window. After a couple of seconds, they left the window, going back to what they were doing. I told a guy to close the curtain.

A lady asked me if I still wanted to use the toilet. I said I would if my brother didn’t mind, who was still there, but decided I would wait, and use another one.

I was watching a cartoon children’s movie. A little girl, and a man, were walking, holding hands, she on his left. The camera was his vision, looking down at the girl. He was saying something, when she came out with, ” I’m a taser kind of girl myself.” I chuckled at this because of how she said it, and her timing of saying it. I mentioned to something there with me that I thought it was funny.

Not a Weight

Before I fell asleep, I saw myself holding up a baby, with a young girl (4, 5) by my left side.

Kyle said something about getting me pregnant. I kinda rolled my eyes at him. He then suggested lying on the bed, and kissing. I half heartedly agreed, knowing what that could lead to.

Something about the sacrament. I was up by the trays, which were shiny silver / chrome, and filled. There were two others, men?, with me. There was someone else there who saw the filled trays for a different purpose.

Something about wings. (Later, during the day, I heard someone say that the gospel is not a weight, but wings…)


I Am the Coach

I am on a military boat, not ship, since it wasn’t quite as long, in a pool. The water looks like a lime green, or perhaps it was green from the pool itself. (The water isn’t dirty.) The boat is bouncing back, and forth, at diagonals, hitting the walls. The movements weren’t harsh. There are teams of men, or teenage boys(?), encircling the control room / center. The coaches are wearing suits / uniforms to distinguish them as such. One such coach, and older black man, is saying, “I am the coach”, and I’m figuring something must’ve been said to him.

The house on the left(?) of us has been bought by us, and was starting to be remodeled. The house on the right, then, was bought by us. I went inside, seeing older pictures (like from the 70’s, 80’s) of several women all over, and also lots of figurines. Some were glass(?). I saw, by the door, something dark, made of dark wood, antique, leaning against the wall. I didn’t go over to it, so don’t know what it was. The shape was similar to a mandolin, but the body, and neck, were both a bit wider, and longer. Amy was in there collecting some of her own figurines she had brought over. I asked her if anyone lived here, and she said no. It looked as if whoever did live here, just up and left without taking anything. As I was looking at the door, two of the workers involved with the remodeling, came crashing through, almost destroying that dark object next to it. I was worried that they were going to.

I was at someone’s house for a gathering. There was a tiny, small, short, old, skinny woman there. She almost looked anorexic. She was telling someone /group about how skinny she was. As I was observing her, I noticed a shape of something under her shirt by her stomach. I figured she had had surgery, and had something removed.

She moved over toward a table that was in front of her, to my right, and started feeling with her heart. She went to the table, and sat down. She got out a pill, took it, and started feeling better. There was a Relief Society president sitting a couple of seats behind her. I was pointing out the old woman to her, but she wasn’t getting it, so I spoke up loud enough for her to hear the woman’s name.

I was on another boat, civil, i think. I was standing by the control room, but on the level above. There were several men at the controls. Their wives were up by me. They were telling me to call out to “Denny”, one of the men. It was so noisy, I didn’t think I would be heard. The women were telling me I would get used to the noise, and were mentioning it took them about a week to get used to it. One of them said she was pregnant while getting used to the noise.

Something about cats, but not sure what about.

Right Direction

I was on tumblr  looking at the pictures. I noticed a chocolate cake, and I think a purse. I didn’t keep in mind the other pictures because I figured I just needed to remember I was on tumblr.

Kyle and I were living Sue’s. The house looked different. Kyle was Sue’s son (in dream). I was so tired in the morning, it was hard to keep my eyelids open. About noon, I decided I better get up. Kyle had his colostomy. He was wanting to have sex to get me pregnant. I was wondering how it would work with his bag.

Sue was in the kitchen, which was on an upper level. Amy was telling her to find ways for me to clean the house. I was thinking it wasn’t Amy’s place to say / suggest such things.

I was making sure a car, which was on an upper level street and had turned right, was travelling in the right / correct direction. I was on a lower level street. There were white industrial buildings in between the streets.


There were three couples, at least the woman, on horseback, with the men walking beside. The woman in back had recently become pregnant. They needed to stop and rest because this woman had become nauseated and needed to vomit.

I put a pug in a steel apron sink to give a bath. As soon as I started filling the sink, the water turned black. I filled it so that the pug’s head could be above water, but also underneath.

A young black girl was putting on a wig. When she faced me, and someone else, all I could see was very short bleached hair that made her look bald. She had a face like the detective in Sister Act. I immediately said, “No, no. The hair needs to be in front.” We moved the wig towards the front more, along with the strands / pieces of hair.

I had a backpack on, getting ready to leave. I was cleaning a wood table. The cleaner I was using was leaving streaks as I wiped.

In Honor

As I was going outside to the backyard, about 3 horses (one of them white) came running up the hill that was there to tell me about another horse that was in trouble / danger. That was the reason why I was going out, so I told them that I knew.

As I started down the hill, I saw, to the left of me, a horse that was standing on a branch of a tree, and starting to sweat because of being there for a while, as I had forgotten about it. (It had gotten there in a previous episode of the dream, but was a reindeer at first, and was lying on it’s back.) I looked below the branch, and saw dirt / ground a couple of feet below, but didn’t want the horse to step down because I wanted to make sure it was actually there first, and not a trick on my eyes.

Ali’s students, from the last several years, got together and made bricks, stamping / carving their names in them. They put the bricks together along a sidewalk of a busy street in honor of him. I noticed some bricks had more than one name on them, and there were several Middle Eastern, and Oriental names.

Ali told me he’s going to pray that I get pregnant tonight, and I asked him why.

Awareness / Awakening

Conscious(ness) awareness / awakening …. The night before, I felt a slight jolt / shock / connection to / with my heart, I then automatically opened my eye for a second, then felt as if I was going to receive some information. Interesting.

a young boy wanted to be excused from the table where some of us were sitting. There were two men sitting across from him, one of them giving a reason why the boy wanted to leave (we were going to play a card game? He was going to do something with cards?). I then asked this man, out of curiosity, if he was the father and he said no.

A group of us, young adults comprising guys and girls, found a lake that one of the girls hadn’t known was there even though this was where she lived. We went jogging around it and saw some squirrels (either I did say, or wanted to say, that they look a little bit different(coloring) from ones I and Ali see), and some baby raccoons / badgers (the ones with the white mask).

One if the guys I put my left arm next to his, touching. While dreaming, I was thinking it was so he could learn from my steps, but then I could’ve been learning from his. I looked down at our feet / steps.

Back at the home of the girl who didn’t  know about the lake (slender, tall, blonde), announced that she had gotten pregnant within the last day or two. She had taken a test (home?), and was going to have another one just to make sure. She was enthusiastic about it. At one point while she was walking, she rubbed her belly.

She picked up something heavy, and I thought, when I saw this, that pregnant women were not supposed to pick up anything heavy because of the chance of miscarrying.

I was standing in a bathroom by the tub (to my left), and noticed the tub and floor were dirty. There were some ants crawling around. Either I said, or wanted to say, the reason the ants were there was because of the dirtiness.