Nothing Is There

(Night before, I asked if we come from different planets, before birth.)

The bathroom is in the hallway, and I see the door open. I walk over to use it. I see that Judy is on the toilet, straight in front of me. She doesn’t see me. I think it odd / strange that she would have / leave the door open.

After a bit, I then see two guys messing around in the shower (nude?). The tub is filled with water, the floor is flooded, all of the hall carpet is soaked.

There are other 20-somethings in the other room. They are all here to party with Judy. One girl, slouching back against the couch, has her breasts covered, but the rest of her is naked. I tell them all to leave, and for the girl to cover herself / put something on.

I then see them outside the window, lowering themselves, using a mountain climbers rope / equipment.

I see them again in another part of the house(?), where there are chairs, and a stage. There are a handful of people in the chairs, watching these people up on the stage, who are lined up, front to back, singing.

Still irritated by them, I walk to the right side side of the stage where the steps are. As I walk up, I am singing for them to leave / go away.

I am standing on a balcony, have a baby bottle (newborn?), filled with milk, and am dripping it on their heads. There is so much milk, that the ground / floor is covered with it. I see to my left, down below, a small boy / small guy, who has slipped and fallen, not moving. The others are walking around him.

I am then sitting on some steps. The cops have been called because of me. I think that they’ve got me now, and will have the connection / link between me and Ali.

They are not dressed in uniform. They are in a circle, talking with some other guys, discussing what to do.

Kyle has an open wound on the inside of his left leg, going from ankle, to halfway up. There is gauze covering it, but is coming off. He has had this wound for a while, waiting for it to close and heal.

He is standing in the kitchen, wanting to cook some food. He had gone where he thought the cupboards were, but nothing was there, only an old yellow wall.

(From Sept. 28, 2014)

(It is evening throughout these dreams, and all at the same place, basically. There were a bunch of small ones, so I picked the most memorable ones.)

I am somewhere with Amy. A church? I never see her, but know she is there. I went out to the parking lot when it was time to leave. She had already gone. I then noticed the parking lot is nearly empty, and I don’t see my car. I start to get scared, and want to start crying. It seems someone came, and walked me to another area, comforting me.

I am outside watching fireworks. There are buildings to my left, and right. I never look at them. In between them is a grassy area. The fireworks are by the building to my right. They were eye level, not up in the sky.

When I first looked at them, they were static / suspended, and I wished I could have taken a picture. They then started moving, after a second, or two. One of the huge ones turned into a man’s face. For some reason, I winked at it. He winked back.

I am in church, in the chapel, walking from front to back, looking for a place to sit. There weren’t benches, but individual seats, along with couches / sofas. I did see one white loveseat, with the curvy back, that was empty, but it was up close to the seats in front of it, so there was no leg room. I finally settled on a couch / chaise in the back, lying down, but with head up. Everyone was there to listen, and learn, but were doing their own thing(s).

On the couch to my left (the front of the room was to my right) was a man, wearing nice black clothes, writing letters to be sent to Paris (I saw Paris on an envelope). His writing was the distinguished 18th century type. I wondered if he was French.

As if reading my mind, he showed me his black attaché(?), speaking with a deep / thick French accent, to where I could only understand him now and then.

His attaché had an embossed picture on it of a nature scene, close up, as if you were there. This man explained that the artist had incorporated his name at the bottom, so people would know who the artist is / was.

After he speaks to me, I see a dog lying on me, resting. I am thinking it might have been a wolf. It is fluffy, and I am petting / stroking it. I ask it if it needs to go pee, since it had been resting there for a while. With slow, small movements, he shook his head no.

A young black girl, sitting in a chair, by a coffee table, at home, with her single mom, and younger brother. Her mom, with lots of long tiny braids, pinned up, is holding the brother, cleaning the table. The girl tells her mom that she’s funny.

Submission

(Warning: little gory at the end.)

I’m somewhere where there are people, but I’m not with them. There’s food in a separate room. I go in by myself, seems the others let me go first, by myself.

A lady (used to be secretary at D. I.) is sitting behind the food table. I grab ?, then some tortilla(?) chips that are almost near the end. I then realized that there isn’t anything to drink, but then remembered that I brought my own grape juice / drink, and pb&j.

I go to throw away the food crumbs, along with a plastic bag / wrap. After I let go, I see what looks like a black bug crawling out. As it keeps moving, it grows into a kitten, walking towards a small hill / mound in front of me, diagonally to my right.

As the kitten is walking, I see a big cat. I then think, “Oh, this must be a bobcat.” It then has its claws in my left pointer finger. I’m wanting it to let go, not sure what I’m doing so that it would, but doesn’t. I then say out loud, “God, let these claws come out.” After saying this, one claw tears through my skin as they come out.

After this, I see the black kitten has walked up the mound, where the white mother is stretched out, lying on the left side, head down. The bottom stomach area, and a small section going across the top of her chest, right below her throat, look like she has been skinned, and is dying.

The kitten goes to one of the skinned nipples to feed, and gets blood on its right paw. I look at the mothers face. She has a look of submission / “That’s the way life goes.” I then get on my knees, and heartbreaking sadness, cry out, “No! No! No!”

Not Sure What To Do

Kyle has come back (from where? Are we still married?), nicely dressed, and walking around normal (his nerves were becoming pinched the last few years of his life). I had the knowledge that he still had his sore / wound in back.

He has brought back a woman with him. He had had sex with her, and was now paying her, giving her 3, or 4, bundles of money. I’m upset, and say to him that he has never given me anything, knowing that he did give me a few things. He doesn’t respond.

I tell this woman, several times, almost pleading, that she doesn’t have to do this. I mention to her that she’s 38, and still wants children. She seems unsure of what to do.

Kyle is sitting outside, talking to someone. The family has gathered inside. As he is walking towards the house to come inside, the door is open, and calling out for Mark. I’m thinking to myself that he isn’t here.

Kyle, me, and another lady, are naked, getting into a sleeping bag(?) big enough for all of us. He wants to be in the middle, facing her. I leave, taking a blanket (that I used to have) with me, going into another room. I lay down between two beds, covering myself, “hiding” from him.

Help Me Hold On

Me, and the old man neighbor, are together at a warehouse that sells plants, and flowers, a nursery. We are resting by the doors, watching the people, which are few. A manager(?), and another employee are doing something behind a counter. (There’s more, but I don’t remember.)

Ali, and I, are walking down a very rocky orange-y / rusty colored hill. About halfway down, I see cars traveling from left to right, on the hill. I see Ali’s vehicle below. Just above the cars, there is a crevice(?). He is able to jump across, and down to the car. He gets in, starts to drive, not leaving. He looks back, waiting for me.

The crevice looks too dangerous for me, so I decide to go back the way we came. I’m not able to get a grip, slowly sliding down. I’m telling myself, out loud, to hold on. I continue slipping, becoming scared. I then cry out, “God, help me hold on!” I then stop, being able to get a grip on the edges of an arrowhead rock formation. I look below, and see that if I had kept going, I would’ve fallen on the hill a bit of a distance down. I then look to my left, and see the wife of a church leader standing on a level area. She was sticking her head out, looking at me.

It Takes Time

Cher is living in an old warehouse / industrial building turned apartments. I’m standing outside her apartment with a woman, and young lady. The wall, and door is vertically to my right, with these ladies standing between me and the apartment. The door is to the right.

This girl is going to be Cher’s roommate, but wanted to come check it out to see if she likes it before making a commitment.

Cher comes out, and the girl excitedly, almost running, goes inside to see.

There are some young guys, local(?) musicians, fooling around on the roof. Something happened to cause a part of Cher’s ceiling to come down, covering a tall spiral(?) sculpture.

I’m sitting, with a man and woman in front of me, to my left. The man is on the left. They both have long grey hair. His is to his butt, hers is to her calves, tapered on the edges a bit. She is wearing a long light blue dress.

She is then standing on the other side of him, facing him. I started to ask her something, then realized she may not know I was talking to her, so I touched her hip.

I ask her how much time it takes to take care of her hair. She smiles, chuckles a bit, then said that it takes time. I ask if she washes all at once. She said she washes in sections, every other day.

Ali is squatting, to the left of me, doing something. I’m paying attention to the fact that he has hair. It is “molded” so that it looks like a Sheiks turban.

(From Sept. 22, 2014)

Someone brings the newborn tabby kittens in a cage. I wonder where the mother is / why she wasn’t brought. (We have week old kittens. The tabby’s were born in April.)

(Ali’s dream)

Driveway on a hill. We are on the sidewalk. I tell him we should go to the left, instead of the right, because there is chaos in the other direction.

(From Sept. 21, 2014)

I am sitting in the front row in a class(?) room (no desks). There are some girls to my right talking about a black guy, who has money. I’m facing these girls, and mention that Briana had been dating him. I then face front, and see her next to me, on my left. I say, “Oh.”

In the evening, I’m walking somewhere (between buildings?), and see him. His name is Kivin. He tells me to tell Briana that he’s still willing to give her a loan. I want to teasingly say that I’ll take a loan, but stop myself because the thought came, what if I can’t repay the loan.

No Late Fees

(Last night, and night before, I asked how I can permanently stop menstruating)

Turning into evening. At grandma Fessler’s house, outside. Seems I am in a car, with a couple other people. We see her Waterford(?) crystal vases. She doesn’t want us to see them, but I tell her that we have seen them lots of times. She gets angry, swearing.

There is a pond out back. A couple of guys walk through, wearing waders. There may have been thrushes. There is a rusted swing set frame in the back of the pond that they are walking to. There are tons of gnats as they walk, getting in their face and lips. The gnats are less at the swing set frame.

To their right, when looking to the back, is Ben, standing, looking forward, being “taught” by a neighbor. There may have been a wall there, a couple of feet in front of him. The neighbor was sitting next to him on his right.

There are many ways to be connected. One way to die.

Grandma has pictures of the bottom of a gate / lock that is down by some water.

No late fees.

(From Sept. 17, 2014)

Before going to sleep, I see a person / child without fingers, or toes. I then see that the eyes are shut closed. I then figure that it’s a fetus.

Bombay wheels

(From Sept. 16, 2014)

(Night before I asked for the meaning of the barbed wire fence dream. )

We create our own pain.

I’m in a car with family, driving along a street from my teenage years. Seems there was snow. I see light blue tube lights hanging from the lampposts. Some are up high, and some are down lower.

(From Sept. 15, 2014)

I’m in a mall(?), and see a young woman wearing what looks like a white lace head covering. At first, I thought it was a hijab, but as I got closer, I realized it was her own covering.

(In the past, I have seen a picture of a horse with the middle of the body cropped out.) I see this horse going from left to right, with a child on top. Surprised, I think to myself that this animal is real.

Then along came a man, and woman, “skooching” along some fringy/ fluffy ottomans. The last one was pink.

I saw some palm plants for sale. Each one was colored royal / indigo blue, black, and white. I wanted the blue and black leaves. I went in to the Asian store, and told them what I wanted. I then see that they a pair of blue glasses have been brought out. I didn’t say anything.

I put them on to get them fitted. They are $.45, so I put a quarter and some nickels on the counter.

The person helping me then goes to help someone else, to my right. I tell myself that if a pair of black glasses are brought out, then I would speak up that I wanted the plants.

While I am waiting for the glasses to be brought back out, I go outside and I see lots of people from different ethnicities.

A young boy is by me, speaking with a Russian(?) accent. My dad is sitting nearby, perturbed that this boy wasn’t speaking proper English. I mention that I thought he said he needed help with his hands.

The Queen is Coming

I’m looking at an outside concert (Britney Spears?) audience. I see a small portion of barbed wire in the back. A young man is sitting on a couple of the barbs, leaning forward, so that you see his back.

He then straightens, pulling back a little. He had stuck the barbs, one on each side, in his groin area, the space between the top of his leg, and his privates. He screams, not from pain, but out of accomplishment. Nothing came out of the holes.

I am at a place where I work, and there are a couple of Brian’s (20 something, but still a child mentality) things that he needed to come back and get.

I am looking at tumblr. I see a gif post that has been blended using two separate ones. On the left, a young woman is standing at the top of a ladder, sprinkling, by hand, some “fairy” dust over another girl below, who is on the right side.

A man, behind a counter (was I shopping?), tells me that he likes the small lock (bracelet size) on the front of my sweats (where usually tie). I think I smiled, wanted to say that my boyfriend (Ali) gave the sweats to me, and the lock came with them.

A young woman is excited. She is talking about ? She is wearing a light / sky blue very formal dress / gown, as if she is royalty. I, or someone else, tells her that the queen is coming. She stops talking, with her mouth open still. I sense she is feeling a little worry / concern.

(Ali’s dream)

We go down to San Diego, around 5 / 6 in the evening. I wait at Starbucks while he goes to a mosque that some guys invited him to.

He gets there late (I’m just writing what he told me), during prayers. He gets in line, praying to the East, which is to the left. They have to pray four times, and he gets there at three, so has to do two on his own. When he finishes, he is facing South, straight ahead. This causes commotion.

Some guys ask him if he’ll help out with a guy who has been arrested. He says, no, that he doesn’t want to get involved. He later finds out that it was a setup.

He comes back to where I am, wanting to go back home. I suggest that we stay a little, relax, and have some passion tea.

(From Sept. 14, 2014

I angrily tell Micalanne, either to her face, or in her direction, that she’s an f-ing b.

Nevermind

(From Sept. 9, 2014 Ali’s dream)

We were lying in bed, snuggling, and comforting each other.

(From Sept. 10, 2014)

I was driving, on hill, on a Sunday. A car was coming in my direction, on the other side. Nervously, I was thinking that there could be a possibility of hitting that car.

I was driving / walking around a corner (clockwise) of a block, having greenery around it. As I got to the “6 o’clock” spot, looking in front of me, toward “12 o’clock”, looking from the middle to front, I see the Titanic going down. The front is dipping below the water. People are screaming. I have the thought that those first people who hit the water will have a better chance of surviving, since they won’t have the suction of the ship to pull them down. Even though I am not there, I have the thought that I am going to join them. I have a little panic / anxiety, but know there isn’t anything I can do to change the situation.

I’m in a room next to a bigger, basketball court shaped, room. I see a black person with short, fluffy hair, like Cree Summer, with medium-sized ringlets. The color was copper / brass. I didn’t know if this was fe/male.

This person’s full name (which I knew) had the initials of R. O. B., so people would call this person Rob. I then realized (came closer to me?) this was a female.

I have a red Tupperware(?) plate with two plump chicken breasts. They are warm / hot, so I give them to Lana to put them away for me to let them cool off first.

When I go in the bigger room to eat them, they are not there. Blake Griffin is standing next to a stage, eating, with plate on stage, back toward me.

I ask where the breasts are, and he says that (rapper / hip hop) has taken it. I become a bit upset at Lana for not setting them aside for me.

I then see Rob making the last two of some pancakes, and then Blake has them on his plate. I walk over to him, asking while walking, if I could have those since I haven’t eaten, and he has. As I finish the question, he takes a bite. I then say, out loud or thought?, nevermind.

Wanting My Attention

I’m in a building, in a class(?, don’t see anyone, but had a feeling), and I see half of a gold wedding band in front of me. Later, next day(?), I see two whole, and complete, bands.

I have an understanding that I am pregnant.

As I’m getting in the car, there is a Dalmatian, and a dachshund, running by me. The Dalmatian wants my attention. I use my hands, directing it boy/girl?, telling it to take the other dog home. The Dalmatian had been here before, with another dog, wanting my attention.

At one point, when I was pointing, to the right, my hand was down between(?) the dogs, and the Dalmatian snarled at me, though I didn’t feel terribly threatened.

I then see a couple of notes taped to the inside of the driver door, on the pocket. There is an additional note, from my mom, explaining that these other notes are from Kyle, and she had forgotten she had them.

As I took off my mom’s note, to read, I tore one of the other ones, diagonally, exposing, but not harming.

I am at my parent’s, deeply devastated at Kyle’s passing, wanting only to stay in bed.

Two men are having a conversation. One says to the other that the government is forgiving student loans (after graduating, implied).

A lady is under the impression that she has to live a painful life, so she sticks her tampons as high as they will go. She also has a semi-dirty house. I don’t say anything about the house, but I must’ve mentioned something about the pain, because I am showing her how to use a pad, since she has never used one before.

There are some men who heard about some wolves on this lady’s property, so they go out to hint them down. By the time they get out there, though, the wolves have already gone over a hill, and crossed over into someone else’s land. The men leave, leaving the other people to deal with the wolves, which doesn’t seem to bother them.

There is a hill in the back of this lady’s house, with trees, and bushes, and a light-colored wooden fence. These men start to walk up this hill, past the fence, when they decide to”hide” on the side of the path, under the trees, and bushes there.

An old, drunken man walks down, with another, younger man. They stop in front of these “hiding” men , which anyone who was paying attention, could see, and the older shoots the younger in the head, and walks on. These men can not believe what they just saw. They can not believe that this many ing here, is now dead. They all know that they are eyewitnesses, in case the old man denies it.

(Ali’s dream)

We are lying in bed, cuddling, and kissing, when some people come in with sick cats, and other animals. I become furiated / animated, telling them to take the animals outside, that they could cause allergies. Ali was not saying anything, and was surprised to see me like this.

(From Sept. 5, 2014)

Ernest Hemingway’s wife is in a convertible limo (their day), being driven by someone famous, enjoying the day.

I’m at someone’s house, in the evening, looking out front. I see that we are on the border of South Beach, Florida, which is a dangerous place.

(From Sept. 4, 2014)

Evening, outside, grassy, hilly area, and I see a big black bird (hawk / eagle size) flying toward me, but not at me. It then grasps, its left talons, a smaller black bird (crow / raven / rook, etc), with the head to the left. Several electric sparks come out of the smaller bird, on the left.

Ali is standing behind me, on my left, back a ways, so I turn, and point the birds out to him, telling him to look.

Could’ve Been Us

(From Sept. 1, 2014 Ali’s dream. See pic below)

We are on an expensive motorcycle, riding along, me in front. We are wearing colorful clothes, as if coming from a festival. There are flowers, and bushes on either side, along with gravel, looking like a small country town. We ride past other cyclists, who follow us.

The road then goes downhill. The light at the bottom is the kind that swings from a wire. There is water on either side.

My speed picks up. Ali says he feels there is a cop waiting, and for me to slow down. I don’t listen.

He then tells me the light is red. I swerve to an open space on the left. The other cyclists continue, one getting killed somehow, and the others getting ticketed by the cop.

After the cop is finished with them, he comes over to us, telling us that he was actually waiting for us. I am taller than he.

I am stunned by the death, and say that that could’ve been us. There is blood, so I don’t go over to look, but Ali does.

(From Aug. 31, 2014)

I see a large area, round tables with white tablecloths set up for a banquet / reception. Not sure if this was inside, or out. Wind was blowing, and a small wave came through. Nothing was disturbed, wrecked.

I am in Paris / Europe, knowing that I am / would be close to the temple in Rome.

There is a guy, who I am up close to, looking at his left arm, outside middle, by his shoulder. There appears to be light yellow coloring, so I ask if it’s a scar, or tattoo. He said it’s the number 50, commemorating some guy’s named Linden (first/last?), accomplishment.

We are then seated separate. He is up against a wall, like in a cave, and calls me over to sit with him. Another guy comes over, and tells him he can take a break. I say to him, “Oh, so you’re the one who instituted the pairing up.”

I’m kneeling, doing something, Ali standing to my left. He starts to become anxious / nervous. He then asks me to marry him. I tell him no, then he starts to relax.

(From Aug. 27 / 28, 2014)

I’m at a park(?), when I see a person across the way, looking like a Mexican guy, wearing white, with a gun. He is shooting, but not killing.

There are leaders of the church here for a meeting / seminar. This guy comes towards us, looking for someone to shoot. As this guy gets closer, though, I see that it is a woman, in her 50’s(?). I “hide”, though I can still be seen. I wasn’t going to say anything, for fear of getting hit, but speak up anyway. I ask her why she is shooting. She says it’s because she is (very) annoyed. I then ask what she is annoyed at, but she walks away without answering.

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