Death / Darkness 

I asked again if the Utah girl was the spirit lady. I was being shown how they both said, and did, the same things (from what Ali told me).

I dreamt of a b&w kitten in a filled up glass measuring cup of water. I was showing it to someone(s). I realized that it had died because of the water, but then remembered that it was barely breathing to begin with. I was saddened by this but I wasn’t devastated.

 I dreamt of watching a movie called “Darkness”. I saw death, as a normal person, “chasing” a girl, who wasn’t able to outrun him. She finally exhausted herself and gave up.

 I then saw his right arm slowly lift and point, as if he was the camera. He had skeleton fingers like the Ghost of Christmas Future in A Christmas Carol. I then saw the girl wrapped in burlap (?) and dropped to the ground.

I dreamt that McDonald’s had started offering healthy /ier foods, which helped a location in a bad neighborhood, to be more successful. I asked a lady something about the owner, who was there helping out. She may have been his wife.

I dreamt of being at the church and needing to use the restroom. I went to the hallway on the right. I couldn’t find it. I walked up and down the hallway to make sure I didn’t walk too fast and miss it. I finally saw a door that said it used to be the Bishop’s (?) office.

I dreamt that I wasn’t wearing my glasses and my vision was blurry but clear enough to get around. They were in a room with my purse. I was searching for my glasses everywhere but where they were.

I dreamt of being in the chapel and the choir was going to sing. Someone said that if anyone wanted to come up and join them, they could. A group of women, holding the words, got up. 

There was a black guy, and family / wife, sitting up front, more to the right, in the congregation. He was in his 50’s / late 40’s, with some weight on him. He was wearing a lavender (?) shirt.

 He asked one of the guys sitting up on the stand, the McDonald’s owner, something but I don’t remember. He smiled and nodded. I was thinking that the black guy was either a new member, or he was just investigating.

I was sitting in the back behind the pews. There were two women standing, in my left, facing me, both nursing on their right breasts, covered. I was thinking that they were tall, or looked tall because I was sitting. The one on the left may have had long blonde hair. 

There was a couch / loveseat in front of me, facing me. There was another lady lying on it, with her head on the left. She also was covered, nursing a baby.

I wondered if I would see her breast when the baby let go, but she stayed covered. She then rolled on to her left side, cuddling up to someone else.

I dreamt that the wife on The Little People (TLC) was related to a guy in the 80’s group “El Dido”. She said how, but I couldn’t understand her.

I dreamt of a being with some women / girls. A wealthy lady came over, showing us some of her rings that she had in a jewelry box. She was letting us take one to keep.

I took one, and then a little later, I took another one that was wood with a design / carving on it. I was deciding which finger to put it on. The others gasped, were shocked when I took it.

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Stuck

I asked, “Were the voices involved in my (poor) performance in school?” The song “Stuck on you” by Lionel Richie came to mind.

I dreamt of lying down, being covered with a blanket on a couch, my head to the left. I may have slept there. Two boys were standing several feet in front of me, playing with their model / toy trucks.

I was worried that I may have been naked so I checked and saw that I was wearing my garments. I was relieved.

I dreamt that I was driving, not sure if Ali was with me. There was a road that merged into where I was, on my right. A car / pickup came from behind, cutting in front of me.

The traffic stopped, so I slowly got up close enough to lightly tap / bump the car. An undercover cop was nearby. He got out of his car, wearing clothes with white. He started walking towards me. I was thinking that I was in trouble but he went to someone else.

(From Aug. 13, 2018 Path)

I asked for the meaning of Mando. I saw a path between two rows of thin trees. I saw other paths, but this is the one I remember.

I dreamt of a pile of grass. I was by it (to check it out?) and got caught inside. It was high enough, and heavy enough, that I needed help to get out. 

There was a lady, who had a rope, and some other things, inside. I got tied in / with the rope. She was planning on killing me. I was crying out for help (to God?). A lady on the outside pulled me out.

I dreamt of an older couple in a hospital. The wife had stopped breathing. The husband soon died after. Several minutes passed and the wife started breathing again and (was) back to normal.

Left Behind

I asked, “What connection was lost?” I was being told something about being left behind.

I dreamt of being at a wood / log lodge with other people, on the way from somewhere, staying a couple days (or week) on the way home. It was Sunday. 

There were two guys in charge who were brothers. One was taller with a stronger build. The taller brother had planned something that he didn’t want the others to know (not sure what but not bad). The other brother told his wife, who got upset at the plan. The taller brother got upset at his brother that his plan had been revealed.

I was lying on a log / wood couch by the front door when they came in. The taller brother was getting after the brother for leaking the plan, and then left.

 I said something, scaring this other brother, who had a lean frame. I then apologized, saying that I thought they had seen me. I then brought up the couple who had gotten together because of being here, and not knowing how long it would’ve taken them if it weren’t for this excursion. I also mentioned that to the taller brother, becoming emotional as I was talking.

I had looked for some Christian music on the radio there because of it being Sunday, but didn’t find much to listen to.

I was sitting outside without a skirt, but did have a slip. I was thinking about my dreams where I was not ready to leave, so I told myself that I needed to get up and get ready.

I went over to the group, who were outside. Some of my cousins were there. I asked Micalanne where something of mine was. She would tell me different items where to look, in of them green, and asking her, “What (name of item)?

Retreat

The cats were in the room so I didn’t ask a question but I was thinking, “What won’t go any further?” I dreamt of needing to use a restroom. There was a small one (like the guest one cut in half) and I was almost positive that I had been able to use that one before. I think I did find a regular sized one.

I dreamt of being with a group of people. Someone had brought a drone. I wanted to fly it. The (joy) stick had to be straight for it to work. A guy (Kevin?) wanted me to fly it over him (so he could see himself on the screen?). As I was flying it, I picked up a sentence of a conversation, which was displayed on the screen. 

I flew it to where we were. We are at two resort looking pools. I then hand over the controls.

I dreamt of a guy (Kevin?) who had young twins.

(From Sept. 2, 2018 Helping)

Last night I asked the shaman question. I dreamt of, I think, peacefully helping Cameron Mathison and his wife through a door. They did it again while / when I was out of sight. The wife got upset wanting a divorce. Cameron was left dumbfounded over what happened. 

I dreamt of a couple and also Romeo and Juliet. I don’t remember the details but I think it was similar to R & J. I was seeing the last scene of them together. She felt guilty for being unloyal to Romeo while they were apart. 

The Lottery

I asked the same question, “What are the answers to the tests that are in the book? ” I dreamt of a train (?) veering off to the right toward water instead of coming in front of me like I had imagined. 

I was standing above what looked to be a bunch of thick tree roots. They were in a depressed area of land. I think I was by the ocean. Some of them almost looked like a woman stretched out / lying down on her stomach. 

I dreamt that I was at a bank (?). I was with a couple of other people (men?). There was something about writing $2 where the recipient should be. I hadn’t asked for it, but a man had me do it. It had something to do with the lottery. 

Walid was there in a line next to us. Seems he was ahead of us. We eventually caught up to him, and maybe passed him. 

I saw to my right snacks that were being sold. Some of them were from SnackWell products of Mexican sweet breads. 

I dreamt that there was a young girl with a beetle taped to the right side of her head. It was eating away at her. I could only see the legs dangling. I was concerned  for her that this could take her life. She didn’t have a right ear but a flap of skin.

(From Sept. 3, 2018 Bad Hygiene)

I asked about the voices. I dreamt that when I looked out my bedroom window when I got up to feed the cats, one of the cats was outside (she could go until neighbors messed with her toes) and I was wondering how she got there. Their friend was out there waiting as well. He was by the little wall (2 bricks high). I didn’t have my glasses on but I was able to manipulate my vision so that I could make out his coloring.

I dreamt that as I walked out of my room, the a/c was on and realized that I had forgotten to turn it off. 

I dreamt of Travis and him having two young blonde girls. The wife was gone. Dead? Divorced? I think maybe dead because of a comment that was said. 

Something about water.

I dreamt that there were three older men living together. Two had bad hygiene. For some reason I went to their place, expecting a horrible smell but instead smelled banana bread, which the third guy loved. 

I dreamt something about a bird out of its cage and the lady owner said something about people who were amazed at this. 

Shadows of Life

Last night I asked, “What is the date that my husband knows about?” I dreamt of seeing someone’s Tumblr conversation about a book called “Shadows of Life”. I didn’t read the conversation. At the end, someone else sarcastically said, “Oh, look. You’re reading the Shadows of Life” book, as a jab at the other person.

I then was reading a poem about the book.

(From Sept. 11, 2018 Look Like Relatives)

I asked about the voices (have talked to Ali since he was little). I dreamt that I was looking through eyes which I thought were the old man’s from Kundalini Yoga Live videos. This person was walking on a stage with a transparent screen. There were lots of people here to do yoga. When this person didn’t start talking, and the people below weren’t paying attention to this person, I realized that it was me.

They started doing yoga but then they were goofing off and not taking it seriously. I left. 

I dreamt that a woman was looking at my left big toenail. She started to take off the last of the top layer (it stops growing and grows a new one underneath. The right one has only done it once or twice before.) I tell her that it happens a lot. She eventually gets the layer off. I see multiple layers and don’t remember if I mentioned these to her or not.

I dreamt of a young couple (30’s?) with 6 or 7 young children. There is also an older man there. They are at a park (?). She is sitting in the back / trunk of the car (like a station wagon / hatchback) looking out. 

She and her husband don’t get to spend a lot of time together. The old man stands between them and us (me and another woman, hispanic(?)). This woman next to me, on my right, overweight, asks the older man if it’s biological, meaning the young couple.

He doesn’t answer, or does he say “no” ? She’s disappointed. I want to ask what she means, but don’t in case she is referring to incest.

The wife is overweight. The couple have sex for about 5 minutes and then the older man moves, revealing the couple. 

I dreamt of a girl crossing a street, coming to my side, but over to my right. There are two other girls still across the street. The girl on my left, from across the street, is singing about love to the girl who is crossing, as if they know each other. They look like sisters / relatives but may not have been. The girl on my side looks back at her but doesn’t react.

I dreamt something about being in a church.

I dreamt that the cats friend was outside laying down with them.

Robin Williams 

(From Feb. 24, 2015)

I’m in a flower shop when a guy, who had ridden his bike there, and had come in through the workshop / stockroom, asks me if Alex (name Ali gives to workers) is here. I tell him, no. He then goes to leave, and I notice flowers, in own bags, against the door to the back. 

There are white flowers (tulips?) laying on the floor of the workshop. The door, going to, had gone from a regular size, to a garage size. 

(From Feb. 22, 2015)

My body had slowed down, being infected. Ali told me that it’s a sign that he’s going to infect me, getting me pregnant, at 11 pm. I said something like, “Oh, really?”, not believing him. He then responded in the affirmative. Instead of going back and forth, I said okay, knowing he would be asleep at that time. 

Gwen Stefani, and her twin, were going to jump from some sort of moving platform, high in the sky, into (pool) water below. At first, I just saw Gwen , riding a horse. I was worried about the horse. The horse then changed into a cabriolet car. The (horse?) was gone, and her twin showed up. They were both singing. Her twin backed up to her. There were people watching, saying that she wasn’t going to make it, etc. I then told them to shut up until they jump before speaking again. 

(From Jan. 25, 2015)

A bunch cats. 

Robin Williams and his wife were married, but there was no relationship. He had lost all hope in life. 

I read a letter he wrote to me, stating how he had wanted to have a relationship with me. 

He was involved with a production, play(?), behind the scenes. At one point, he was in his dressing room. I urgently told several guys to go check on him, because I had a feeling he was going to harm himself. (This dream woke me up, and I wanted to cry for him. Writing this makes me want to cry.)

The Mother

I am standing between benches, turned toward the back, in the chapel of the church, on the right side, speaking with someone. I am wearing an empire waist dress, blue / sea green(?) coloring, maybe some tiny flowers(?). My hair is dark brown / black, but looks natural. I have added some pounds (10-15/20).

A tall, big man walks in at the back. He sees me, and walks to the left toward a lady, to ask about me. Jovially / happily, she says, “Oh, the Mother”, and brings him to me, which by now I’m near the front on the left side, and introduces him to me. He reminds me of Kyle, intriguing me. I tell him, yes, I am a mother, thinking about my two children, thus the weight. Later on, though, I realize / tell myself that I don’t have any children.

This man has a Polish last name, with the weird spelling. He is funny, having previously been on SNL. His singing is beautiful, to almost being of an operatic quality, seeing him sitting where the choir sits, in the top row.

At one point, I am walking through a hallway, in the church, with him, and others, behind me. I’m having a bit of a difficult time walking, but not struggling, with a smile on my face when I look back.

There are some cards with names inside. Don’t know what for. I see mine, and the big guys together, mine having his last name. A man says it’s because he always sees us together.

I’m sitting outside, by a round table with an umbrella(?), watching two dark black bald men, who are about 20 yards away, get situated. I’m wondering what the big guy would say / do if he saw me looking, but also thinking it wouldn’t bother him too much.

I had put a sleeping bag outside, in the back, but forgot about it. Next thing I know, it’s raining, and Steve, as a young boy (11?), is in it. A church leader, who isn’t physically there, but can see him, asked how he is doing. Steve responded that he is fine, except for the fact that he can’t feel his fingers / hands, and toes / feet. He then covers himself. There is a small grave next to him, with something buried.

There is a line of Asian men, wearing black suits, holding red umbrellas, on the side of a mountain. I only see the faces of the first couple of them, as I see them from above. I don’t know where they came from, where they are going, or how many there are, as I assume that they go around the corner.

(From Oct. 26, 2014)

A tall, big man, who likes me, and wants to get involved, picked me up so that my back was against his left arm, and my legs over his right.

I’m worried about him being able to hold my weight, but then concluded that he could because of his stature.

(From Oct. 25, 2014)

I’m outside, taking a test. My teacher is Bishop Powers. He is enjoying the day, and is enjoying it so much, that he becomes overheated, and needs to lie down on a table. I mention to him, “I thought you had learned from last time”, or something to that effect.

While taking the test, we were able to freely converse with each other. I was one of the last two to finish. The test papers were more like a thin book stapled(?) together, and the pages were of varying shapes, sizes, and maybe colors. The questions themselves also weren’t thought out well. One of the last ones wanted me to put in order several animals, stacked upon each other, which included a hummingbird, turtle, and a cat. The longer I looked at this, more animals seemed to show up.

A guy appeared, as I was finishing, who sat as close to me as he could, on the right side, in an affectionate way. He looked a combination of Eddie Vedder, and a 7th grade t.a. We had taken a previous class together, and knew each other from that, but didn’t do anything outside of that class.

He told me he was from Provo, Utah, and he was what is known / called “Nu Essence”. He then took out, from his right pants pocket, what looked like a small jewelry box, and then got on the ground next to me, facing me. He said he was what was called “Level(?)”, which I might have heard of / about. I told him no, I hadn’t. He then started to explain. (I woke as he was doing so.)

As he was on the ground, I assumed that he was going to ask me to marry him. I was thinking I would tell him that we hardly know each other, but I was considering saying yes. I was also going to tell him that I would give him an answer the next day, as I needed to discuss this with Ali.

(From Oct. 24, 2014)

Ali was gone for several days, for something, and my dad was here with me. Shortly after going to bed, the alarm went off. I went to check it out, and by the time I got to it, it was turned off, and a guy from church in Moreno Valley was there. He came because some of the floor, in the kitchen(?), needed to be removed and replaced. I saw water underneath the house. He then left, but I told him the floor needed to be fixed, and he said it would be. Another guy, also from church in Moreno Valley, showed up to fix it.

The alarm was in a closet, and I saw writing, in black ink, written by a lady. Ali had smudged some of it, maybe so I couldn’t read it?

We had a large round, globe sized, chandelier, and two men were fixing the lights / lighting.

I was reading, in a newspaper(?), “The life you are to have will be”, or something along those lines.

Dad asked about death, if whether now, or at the end life, or both. I said both.

(From Oct. 23, 2014)

A female is parked in a white car, backed up. Not in a lot, but more like under an empty overpass. I don’t see her. She is frantic, on the phone to 911. She is telling the operator that a man is coming after her. The operator knows about this man.

The man, in a car, backs up to her car, speeding, crunching hers, then takes off.

I’m standing on the passenger side, by the back, a ways back. I see her falling out in two, but she is not a body, but more like two burnt circles. I think someone comes with something to cover her.

Black family, mostly women in their 50’s / 60’s, leave church early, as one of them is in a wheelchair, and they don’t want the other people to get in the way.

David Bowie is there, dressed warmly in a dark sweater. I ask him if Iman is ok with him being Mormon. He acknowledges yes.

We (including?) are at Oprah’s house, looking at her collectibles collection. She has some life-sized statues from different movies. She also has some things of Einstein.

I am riding in a rail train, with no top, with somebody else, inside this room. Looking down, I mention that the rail isn’t there, but then I see it.

I’m in Alan Alda’s bedroom, standing at the end, to the left (if on the bed). I think there might also be an orangey cat.

Alan is on the right side of the bed. He has on those square glasses with the big black frames. He is wearing striped pajamas, but I see that they are see through, and see what looks like white shorts underneath.

His wife is next to him, sitting up, with shorts on. She is skinny, so much so, that I can see a bone sticking out of her left leg, up by the hips. She has really short hair, and I wonder if she is gay. There are several different colored striped pajamas on the end of the bed between them.

Alan puts his arm over her stomach / chest area, bringing her down, wanting to get frisky with her. She mentions that I am there. I know they do other things, read, when I’m not there.

(Didn’t realize I had so much to write.)

Help Me Hold On

Me, and the old man neighbor, are together at a warehouse that sells plants, and flowers, a nursery. We are resting by the doors, watching the people, which are few. A manager(?), and another employee are doing something behind a counter. (There’s more, but I don’t remember.)

Ali, and I, are walking down a very rocky orange-y / rusty colored hill. About halfway down, I see cars traveling from left to right, on the hill. I see Ali’s vehicle below. Just above the cars, there is a crevice(?). He is able to jump across, and down to the car. He gets in, starts to drive, not leaving. He looks back, waiting for me.

The crevice looks too dangerous for me, so I decide to go back the way we came. I’m not able to get a grip, slowly sliding down. I’m telling myself, out loud, to hold on. I continue slipping, becoming scared. I then cry out, “God, help me hold on!” I then stop, being able to get a grip on the edges of an arrowhead rock formation. I look below, and see that if I had kept going, I would’ve fallen on the hill a bit of a distance down. I then look to my left, and see the wife of a church leader standing on a level area. She was sticking her head out, looking at me.