Nothing Is There

(Night before, I asked if we come from different planets, before birth.)

The bathroom is in the hallway, and I see the door open. I walk over to use it. I see that Judy is on the toilet, straight in front of me. She doesn’t see me. I think it odd / strange that she would have / leave the door open.

After a bit, I then see two guys messing around in the shower (nude?). The tub is filled with water, the floor is flooded, all of the hall carpet is soaked.

There are other 20-somethings in the other room. They are all here to party with Judy. One girl, slouching back against the couch, has her breasts covered, but the rest of her is naked. I tell them all to leave, and for the girl to cover herself / put something on.

I then see them outside the window, lowering themselves, using a mountain climbers rope / equipment.

I see them again in another part of the house(?), where there are chairs, and a stage. There are a handful of people in the chairs, watching these people up on the stage, who are lined up, front to back, singing.

Still irritated by them, I walk to the right side side of the stage where the steps are. As I walk up, I am singing for them to leave / go away.

I am standing on a balcony, have a baby bottle (newborn?), filled with milk, and am dripping it on their heads. There is so much milk, that the ground / floor is covered with it. I see to my left, down below, a small boy / small guy, who has slipped and fallen, not moving. The others are walking around him.

I am then sitting on some steps. The cops have been called because of me. I think that they’ve got me now, and will have the connection / link between me and Ali.

They are not dressed in uniform. They are in a circle, talking with some other guys, discussing what to do.

Kyle has an open wound on the inside of his left leg, going from ankle, to halfway up. There is gauze covering it, but is coming off. He has had this wound for a while, waiting for it to close and heal.

He is standing in the kitchen, wanting to cook some food. He had gone where he thought the cupboards were, but nothing was there, only an old yellow wall.

(From Sept. 28, 2014)

(It is evening throughout these dreams, and all at the same place, basically. There were a bunch of small ones, so I picked the most memorable ones.)

I am somewhere with Amy. A church? I never see her, but know she is there. I went out to the parking lot when it was time to leave. She had already gone. I then noticed the parking lot is nearly empty, and I don’t see my car. I start to get scared, and want to start crying. It seems someone came, and walked me to another area, comforting me.

I am outside watching fireworks. There are buildings to my left, and right. I never look at them. In between them is a grassy area. The fireworks are by the building to my right. They were eye level, not up in the sky.

When I first looked at them, they were static / suspended, and I wished I could have taken a picture. They then started moving, after a second, or two. One of the huge ones turned into a man’s face. For some reason, I winked at it. He winked back.

I am in church, in the chapel, walking from front to back, looking for a place to sit. There weren’t benches, but individual seats, along with couches / sofas. I did see one white loveseat, with the curvy back, that was empty, but it was up close to the seats in front of it, so there was no leg room. I finally settled on a couch / chaise in the back, lying down, but with head up. Everyone was there to listen, and learn, but were doing their own thing(s).

On the couch to my left (the front of the room was to my right) was a man, wearing nice black clothes, writing letters to be sent to Paris (I saw Paris on an envelope). His writing was the distinguished 18th century type. I wondered if he was French.

As if reading my mind, he showed me his black attaché(?), speaking with a deep / thick French accent, to where I could only understand him now and then.

His attaché had an embossed picture on it of a nature scene, close up, as if you were there. This man explained that the artist had incorporated his name at the bottom, so people would know who the artist is / was.

After he speaks to me, I see a dog lying on me, resting. I am thinking it might have been a wolf. It is fluffy, and I am petting / stroking it. I ask it if it needs to go pee, since it had been resting there for a while. With slow, small movements, he shook his head no.

A young black girl, sitting in a chair, by a coffee table, at home, with her single mom, and younger brother. Her mom, with lots of long tiny braids, pinned up, is holding the brother, cleaning the table. The girl tells her mom that she’s funny.

Submission

(Warning: little gory at the end.)

I’m somewhere where there are people, but I’m not with them. There’s food in a separate room. I go in by myself, seems the others let me go first, by myself.

A lady (used to be secretary at D. I.) is sitting behind the food table. I grab ?, then some tortilla(?) chips that are almost near the end. I then realized that there isn’t anything to drink, but then remembered that I brought my own grape juice / drink, and pb&j.

I go to throw away the food crumbs, along with a plastic bag / wrap. After I let go, I see what looks like a black bug crawling out. As it keeps moving, it grows into a kitten, walking towards a small hill / mound in front of me, diagonally to my right.

As the kitten is walking, I see a big cat. I then think, “Oh, this must be a bobcat.” It then has its claws in my left pointer finger. I’m wanting it to let go, not sure what I’m doing so that it would, but doesn’t. I then say out loud, “God, let these claws come out.” After saying this, one claw tears through my skin as they come out.

After this, I see the black kitten has walked up the mound, where the white mother is stretched out, lying on the left side, head down. The bottom stomach area, and a small section going across the top of her chest, right below her throat, look like she has been skinned, and is dying.

The kitten goes to one of the skinned nipples to feed, and gets blood on its right paw. I look at the mothers face. She has a look of submission / “That’s the way life goes.” I then get on my knees, and heartbreaking sadness, cry out, “No! No! No!”

Not Sure What To Do

Kyle has come back (from where? Are we still married?), nicely dressed, and walking around normal (his nerves were becoming pinched the last few years of his life). I had the knowledge that he still had his sore / wound in back.

He has brought back a woman with him. He had had sex with her, and was now paying her, giving her 3, or 4, bundles of money. I’m upset, and say to him that he has never given me anything, knowing that he did give me a few things. He doesn’t respond.

I tell this woman, several times, almost pleading, that she doesn’t have to do this. I mention to her that she’s 38, and still wants children. She seems unsure of what to do.

Kyle is sitting outside, talking to someone. The family has gathered inside. As he is walking towards the house to come inside, the door is open, and calling out for Mark. I’m thinking to myself that he isn’t here.

Kyle, me, and another lady, are naked, getting into a sleeping bag(?) big enough for all of us. He wants to be in the middle, facing her. I leave, taking a blanket (that I used to have) with me, going into another room. I lay down between two beds, covering myself, “hiding” from him.

Help Me Hold On

Me, and the old man neighbor, are together at a warehouse that sells plants, and flowers, a nursery. We are resting by the doors, watching the people, which are few. A manager(?), and another employee are doing something behind a counter. (There’s more, but I don’t remember.)

Ali, and I, are walking down a very rocky orange-y / rusty colored hill. About halfway down, I see cars traveling from left to right, on the hill. I see Ali’s vehicle below. Just above the cars, there is a crevice(?). He is able to jump across, and down to the car. He gets in, starts to drive, not leaving. He looks back, waiting for me.

The crevice looks too dangerous for me, so I decide to go back the way we came. I’m not able to get a grip, slowly sliding down. I’m telling myself, out loud, to hold on. I continue slipping, becoming scared. I then cry out, “God, help me hold on!” I then stop, being able to get a grip on the edges of an arrowhead rock formation. I look below, and see that if I had kept going, I would’ve fallen on the hill a bit of a distance down. I then look to my left, and see the wife of a church leader standing on a level area. She was sticking her head out, looking at me.

It Takes Time

Cher is living in an old warehouse / industrial building turned apartments. I’m standing outside her apartment with a woman, and young lady. The wall, and door is vertically to my right, with these ladies standing between me and the apartment. The door is to the right.

This girl is going to be Cher’s roommate, but wanted to come check it out to see if she likes it before making a commitment.

Cher comes out, and the girl excitedly, almost running, goes inside to see.

There are some young guys, local(?) musicians, fooling around on the roof. Something happened to cause a part of Cher’s ceiling to come down, covering a tall spiral(?) sculpture.

I’m sitting, with a man and woman in front of me, to my left. The man is on the left. They both have long grey hair. His is to his butt, hers is to her calves, tapered on the edges a bit. She is wearing a long light blue dress.

She is then standing on the other side of him, facing him. I started to ask her something, then realized she may not know I was talking to her, so I touched her hip.

I ask her how much time it takes to take care of her hair. She smiles, chuckles a bit, then said that it takes time. I ask if she washes all at once. She said she washes in sections, every other day.

Ali is squatting, to the left of me, doing something. I’m paying attention to the fact that he has hair. It is “molded” so that it looks like a Sheiks turban.

(From Sept. 22, 2014)

Someone brings the newborn tabby kittens in a cage. I wonder where the mother is / why she wasn’t brought. (We have week old kittens. The tabby’s were born in April.)

(Ali’s dream)

Driveway on a hill. We are on the sidewalk. I tell him we should go to the left, instead of the right, because there is chaos in the other direction.

(From Sept. 21, 2014)

I am sitting in the front row in a class(?) room (no desks). There are some girls to my right talking about a black guy, who has money. I’m facing these girls, and mention that Briana had been dating him. I then face front, and see her next to me, on my left. I say, “Oh.”

In the evening, I’m walking somewhere (between buildings?), and see him. His name is Kivin. He tells me to tell Briana that he’s still willing to give her a loan. I want to teasingly say that I’ll take a loan, but stop myself because the thought came, what if I can’t repay the loan.

Russian

David Wolfe looked poor/ homeless. His hair had the beginnings of being greasy / oily. He was at my grandmas house, in the front yard. He was pulling out sections of grass, like a carpet, and moving them back and forth, like someone who doesn’t know what he is doing. He was wanting to take a piece, to take back to where he lived, without being noticed.

At one corner, there was a handle underneath, to help him move the piece. The grass was growing under the piece (I said it looks like carpet). I thought to myself, “Oh, that’s how it grows.” There was a hole under this piece.

Something about a fluffy puppy, going poop, and me holding it for a while as it slept.

Something about someone’s hair, and looking for (a) bobby pin(s).

I was holding David while he slept, outside of a building, my left arm behind his back. His last name is now Russian. His skin turns dark like an India Indian when he sleeps, but lightens up when he wakes.

When he wakes, I make some funny faces, and then laugh.

Robert Mailhouse walks past us, on the sidewalk. He also looks poor / homeless. The back of his neck is covered with a tattoo.

Another actor is walking behind him, holding a small blonde boy. He also looks the same.

A boy, 10(?), walks around a corner of bushes, 10 yards away(?), past us, toward the building. I ask David, “Isn’t that your brother?” He responds, “In-law.” This boy had the same last name. I Kinda pushed David forward a little so the boy would look, but he kept walking

A blonde woman, buxom some, with some weight, comes out from the building, behind us, to the right. She says to me,” Oh, look what you bought”, attempting to be pleasant, then went back in.

Rihanna, and Nicki Minaj, were wearing theatrical makeup for everyday use. Rihanna had dark eyes, with dark brown, exaggerated smudged(?) lines under her eyes.

Nicki’s makeup looked like a geisha, but instead of white, she used different shades of pink, which didn’t go to her hairline, but looked more like a mask.

No Late Fees

(Last night, and night before, I asked how I can permanently stop menstruating)

Turning into evening. At grandma Fessler’s house, outside. Seems I am in a car, with a couple other people. We see her Waterford(?) crystal vases. She doesn’t want us to see them, but I tell her that we have seen them lots of times. She gets angry, swearing.

There is a pond out back. A couple of guys walk through, wearing waders. There may have been thrushes. There is a rusted swing set frame in the back of the pond that they are walking to. There are tons of gnats as they walk, getting in their face and lips. The gnats are less at the swing set frame.

To their right, when looking to the back, is Ben, standing, looking forward, being “taught” by a neighbor. There may have been a wall there, a couple of feet in front of him. The neighbor was sitting next to him on his right.

There are many ways to be connected. One way to die.

Grandma has pictures of the bottom of a gate / lock that is down by some water.

No late fees.

(From Sept. 17, 2014)

Before going to sleep, I see a person / child without fingers, or toes. I then see that the eyes are shut closed. I then figure that it’s a fetus.

Bombay wheels

(From Sept. 16, 2014)

(Night before I asked for the meaning of the barbed wire fence dream. )

We create our own pain.

I’m in a car with family, driving along a street from my teenage years. Seems there was snow. I see light blue tube lights hanging from the lampposts. Some are up high, and some are down lower.

(From Sept. 15, 2014)

I’m in a mall(?), and see a young woman wearing what looks like a white lace head covering. At first, I thought it was a hijab, but as I got closer, I realized it was her own covering.

(In the past, I have seen a picture of a horse with the middle of the body cropped out.) I see this horse going from left to right, with a child on top. Surprised, I think to myself that this animal is real.

Then along came a man, and woman, “skooching” along some fringy/ fluffy ottomans. The last one was pink.

I saw some palm plants for sale. Each one was colored royal / indigo blue, black, and white. I wanted the blue and black leaves. I went in to the Asian store, and told them what I wanted. I then see that they a pair of blue glasses have been brought out. I didn’t say anything.

I put them on to get them fitted. They are $.45, so I put a quarter and some nickels on the counter.

The person helping me then goes to help someone else, to my right. I tell myself that if a pair of black glasses are brought out, then I would speak up that I wanted the plants.

While I am waiting for the glasses to be brought back out, I go outside and I see lots of people from different ethnicities.

A young boy is by me, speaking with a Russian(?) accent. My dad is sitting nearby, perturbed that this boy wasn’t speaking proper English. I mention that I thought he said he needed help with his hands.