6-31-12

(From yesterday)

I was to sign and date papers for a bank, and to use the date of 6-31-12.

Mom had a (grey, or brown) guide dog that looked somewhat like a greyhound, but was almost paper-thin, not from malnourishment, but that’s how the structure of the dog was. Mom dies, and the dog goes to the back left corner of the garage, facing the back wall. I go over to it and bring it to be a part of the family.

There is what looks like a junkyard of stuff for people to buy in the backyard that my mom was in charge of. People are still coming to look (couple of people at a time), and I’m with ?, and ask if these people should still be coming.

I have shorts on, and pull pants (non-jean) on over to see how they fit. They fir pretty well.

I go to a game with Amy, bringing the dog along. Sara, George, Micalanne and the twins (Micalanne’s daughters) show up later. When they show up, Micalanne tells one of the twins to go get something to eat. I have the dog on a leash. The dog turns into an older woman, and goes to visit some people a couple rows down to the left. As she comes back up, she is holding some popcorn and something else. Amy is wearing a long sleeve shirt (like a man’s shirt), and has brought an extra one for me for when it gets cold. I realize this won’t be warm enough and walk to the house, which is practically next door, to get a coat.

I’m sitting next to an exterior window, seeing a golden retriever puppy that is being eaten by insects. The head is face up, but everything is gone but the skull (sides and back, as if it had been scooped out), and fur. The rest of the body is open, with guts showing, going down to about the bottom part of the stomach. The rest is still together. I think how sad it is for this to happen to the puppy.

Another golden retriever pup shows up next to the dead one, looks at, and goes over sticking it’s head where the head is, then bounds inside. Before coming inside, I mention, or ask, about someone grooming the dog because the fur was starting to look a bit scraggly. When it came inside, the fur was the normal wavy kind of way some of them have.

Big Weight

(From yesterday)

A tall man, close to 7 ft, if he isn’t already, weighing roughly around 600 pounds, walks out a door.

Me, and another girl, bleach our short hair (about jaw length). Mine is a shade of yellow, while hers is darker. I mention that I had used some bleach along with the product.

Kyle’s mom isn’t able to stay at the hospital, and is coming to stay with us. I’m doing something at the house while waiting (there’s a lot going on), but don’t remember what. His mom shows up, but I’m not able to meet her because of other people standing in front of her, and then I get pulled away. (She passed away before Kyle and I met, but I have seen pictures.)

Kim is sobbing because she is no longer able to be a guardian over a red pencil.

 

Seat of My Pants

(From Nov. 25, 2013)

I’m waiting for Christmas lights, that are wrapped around a Christmas tree, to do something. I wake up nauseated, because of the dream, or just because?

I am on a journey, and I believe there are some people with me. I stop to use a restroom.

School girls are using a restroom, and making sure everyone flushes the toilets, and washes their hands. I have a realization that when these girls use the restroom individually, they don’t care as much.

I am in the same restroom. I check the stalls to see which i could use. The toilets were the bowls only. There were about 4, or 5 that I checked, and all but one had something in them. I didn’t go all the way in to see what. One of which had pink in it. The toilet I was able to use was positioned higher than the others, with no door, facing double doors to the exit of the restroom, both being open. I was thinking to mention for someone to close a door when someone closed both of them.  Before I sat down, I placed something mesh on the seat. I urinated, and ended up getting the seat of my pants wet. I wasn’t exactly bothered by this, but used a folded towel around my waist (like a sweater), figuring no on would want to see my wet pants.

There was an African woman in one of the stalls with the door open, or gone. She is defecating (by the look on her face), and some of the women in the restroom are pointing out (with no judgement, but as a matter of fact) that she is “in the open”. I mention to them that this is probably better than where she came from, and about what Ali told me of the people in Africa going behind bushes.

This woman has some rectangular shaped papers (about the thickness of 3 x 5’s), colored shades of brown from top to bottom, with English words to help her learn the language.

I started back on my journey, which seems I was in a wash and there were bridges spaced a part going from one side to the other. Seems there may have been bits of water in there as well. Looking ahead, I see it’s a bit of a distance to go, but I see a sunset at the other end. I am to walk this distance.

There are some black woman sitting at a table, one of which has her back to me. She is wearing a white tank top, talking on the phone to her husband. I notice that she has underarm hair, and wonder what her husband thinks of it.

Not For Sale

(From Nov. 23, 2013)

Compartmentalize my pictures (Am I being acknowledged that I already do, or am I to refine even more?)

(From Nov. 24, 2013)

I was in the foyer of church with an older woman (who still had spunk) who looked like my grandma Fessler (paternal), but she isn’t. I noticed some very nice looking lamps (the decor had changed from last time I was there, which had also been well done), blue and white chinoiserie, and wondered if I would be able to buy one. The woman said that the church never sells its things.

This woman is kneeling on a chair, teasingly looking at a black woman she knows , who is on the other side of the wall. The black woman is not looking back, but seems to be concentrating with her jaw / chin resting on her right hand.

I opened a white door, somewhat in the shape of a public restroom stall, and notice a black man sitting next to a child, teaching this child, so I close the door, and go back.

I was in a room, observing, with other people who were doing some activity. I noticed a lesbian there among them.

I started to walk across a parking lot to my car, which was hidden behind a wall to the left. As I started, a black lady in an older Buick, speedily reverses her car, with a banner attached to front to celebrate someone, clipping  the outside of the drivers headlight of a new Cadillac(?) behind her. As she did so, I thought to myself how typical it was of her to do that, needing to show off. The Cadillac had an indention to the left (when looking at the car) of the headlight, not damaging the light.

I was in a building with other people, and a couple of them, one of them a female (only seeing the female as she was the last), came up to me, patting me on the back, to thank me for advice I had given them. I thought it strange for them to do so, but said you’re welcome anyway.

(Ali’s Dream)

He was looking for his car. Black people were around. He prayed out loud for God to help him find the car. He woke up, realizing the car was here at home.

Directions

I stopped at a small store off the highway, asking three older men directions. (I believe it had been snowing, and possibly there was a storm, and I had stopped during the middle of the storm. I am not quite positively sure on this, but this is what I am sensing.) I am holding a piece of paper with an amateurly drawn map of the area on it. The road I want is partially off the paper, up top. The men are showing me that even though on paper the distance may look long, it reality it is only a short distance. (If I had a dream earlier where I was told I was complete, why am I dreaming about directions?)

My parents (non waking life), and I are at an apartment (I’m sensing), apartment sitting. Packages / deliveries (roughly around 3? in total) for a person named Steven, who doesn’t live there, keep being delivered there, and my dad keeps accepting them. The last one, my dad is formally dressed, without the coat, when he accepts the package / delivery, and he gets upset about these being delivered (t)here. I say to him, “Why get upset over accepting deliveries / packages of a person who doesn’t live here?” (Does the wording of package / delivery matter?)

I walk outside, and across the street are single story buildings, as in a strip mall, all stuck together, with level roofs. There are no businesses there. The ones on the left are all painted blue. Top to bottom, and perhaps even on the roof. The buildings on the right are painted green in the same way. As if someone had taken huge cans of paint, and threw, dumped, what have you, at the buildings. In front of the green buildings, looking peripherally, I sense there are two old time gas station islands (like from back in the 50’s, or 60’s).

We are back home, and I have accidentally taken a blue plastic placemat, made with (designer, not round) holes, from the apartment. (I don’t use a placemat, but I do use a mat that I place under the food to neutralize the chemicals, and such that is in the food.) I had put some slices of chocolate cake on a plate, and my dad mentioned to me (kinda irritated) that I was eating too much.

Reindeer

My body was still tired, and sluggish, but when a lady was telling me it was time to get up, I relented and got up.

I was at someone’s house whose backyard backed into the woods. The house had a pass through driveway that went between sections of the house. I was in the section on the right, the family / play room, with some boys (who lived there) who were playing around. In the backyard were several reindeer, and other big (but not quite as big) animals passing through. It was green and plush back there. They, or at least one of the reindeer, saw us. One of them came over to the pass through and was attempting, using the horns, to break through the glass of the door, but was not able to. I was right there on the other side. I didn’t feel a sense of danger were it to come through. I noticed how big, and massive the animal was, horns and all.

One of the older boys took a black watch away from a younger boy because the watch was turning the younger boy into a zombie (can’t remember actual word used, but similar to this). The older boy kept putting the watch up to my ear for me to hear the ticking. Sometimes I could, sometimes I couldn’t but didn’t let him know.

I was in the backseat of a stationary new Volvo looking at the entertainment system in the middle of the seat(s).

There was a car that drove over two sections of a wall(?).

Shedding

I was supposed to work the night shift, but my body was too tired to move, so i stayed in bed.

I was in the bathroom looking at myself in a full length mirror. My face, and arms were sunburned. They had calmed down from the stinging feeling.  My arms were slightly stiff. There was a piece of skin left on my nose to be peeled off. My hair was long (about bra strap length) with Betty Page type bangs. My facial features looked more richer and refined.

People needed to look up my name on a website, or it would go away. Others, who had lots of charisma, had tons of people looking, whereas my name was being visited slowly.

My niece Bethany was shirtless, and flat chested, and wearing shorts. She had a scraggle of hair on her face, some on her chest, and I think some on her arms. She was talking to me, and I wanted to ask her if she had turned lesbian, but didn’t want to interrupt her.

My twin nieces were waiting for a goth guy who wore black makeup.

My aunt Barbie was using her own toilet she had brought (like a training toilet), and was talking with the family members who were there with her. The toilets were in an open space, with no walls between. She thought she was finished, but when she was about to leave, felt she had to go again. She was sitting next to another toilet she could’ve used that looked somewhat like a latrine toilet.

New

I was told that the Christmas tree was a symbol for birth. (Do you see a connection between the two?)

I was inside in a two story house looking outside down at the driveway. There are two people, man and woman, who drove luxury cars, down there. They walk around the house for a reason, but not sure why. The man starts to leave first, but as he starts to back up, a car comes up behind him. A woman gets out of the passenger side (her husband is the driver), and starts taking pictures of the car.

She gets inside the house, and grabs an empty shopping bag (Burlington Coat Factory?) that has been put away for recycling. As she is leaving, I yell, “Hey!” to her, and as she runs out, I have my camera, and take pictures of her, and the license plate of the car she came in.

(This is where it gets a bit weird. I’ll do my best in describing it.)

Ali has taken a lot of the furniture, and other things, out of the front room to outside. The room is now empty, from what I see. Outside, a woman starts to take a (4 drawer ?) tall, dark wood, dresser with the drawers slightly crooked. I go after it, and take it back. The other pieces of furniture are broken down a bit.

Ali has the front door open, and he’s playing his recorded music a bit loud. One of his female students is over.

Ali has put some boards up around the front of the house, but they are movable to be able to get through. He isn’t paying attention to me. My sister Micalanne is over, trying to help me with the situation.

I see Ali in the front room, sleeping on ?, and as I look around, I’m thinking we’ll have to start over and buy new things.

Come Inside

I was told that a certain guy would be perfect for me. When I first saw him, I saw his back, with him walking away from me, and being whiny with his mom. I went over to him, and asked him questions to help him understand hers, and his character. He started to calm down.

This guy turns into a small dragon animal. (Small somewhat like the picture of a “baby” dragon on someone’s fingers, but a bit bigger than that.) He starts biting my right pointer finger, and I ask him why he is he doing that when I haven’t done anything to him. He stops.

He, and I, are in a house. I am lying in bed, watching tv (didn’t see the tv). I have a kitten with me. Still as a dragon, feeling unworthy, this guy is down at my feet. I tell him he can come up to my shoulders, which he does.

He then turns back into human, but is short, about to my waist(?). We are at a park for some event that was happening. I see an Asian family with three young daughters about 7 – 10 years old. The mother is pregnant again. I imagine what it would feel like, and kinda get the feeling, or did I become pregnant?

I am inside by the front doors of an empty, where I am, social services building. I am cleaning the floors. There is some red candy that I scrape off, then I sweep. This guy comes up to an open (regular) window where a lady worker is sitting. He comes to talk to her, and she says for him to come inside to talk.

I leave, barefoot, with it raining outside. I am walking, and don’t seem to be too bothered by not having shoes, though I am conscious of the fact. I come to an intersection (there are several other people as well), and can go either straight, or to the right.

At some time, I was talking to this guy about buying school supplies for the coming school year for (my daughter?). He has a daughter of his own, so I knew he would understand.

The Attack

Ali and I were living in a small apartment that had the feel of a motel. It was white inside. There was a small hill outside the front door, with tall palm trees lined up on the edge of the hill, and there may have been water on the other side of the trees. It reminded me of Florida. There were tribal invaders in the neighborhood, coming from a country with a dictator. They were killing the big cats for their markings, and having skinning them, acted as if given a trophy. I was saddened at this, not knowing what to do to stop them. I kept telling Ali that they can’t do this here in the states. One of the guys killed, and skinned a cat in the front of our place, and held up the skin with glee, showing it off. I didn’t actually see the killing, and him skinning. It turned into Halloween, and these guys, and some young (teenage), put on some camouflage military uniforms. They then had bow and arrows, and were pointing them at the people outside. The people weren’t scared, but went with the flow. There was a lady with a Bronco(?) vehicle with the back filled with kittens, and small alien looking animals. I could only the tops of their heads. They had big eyes, almost like cyclops. Some were looking at me, not scared, but wondering what was going to happen to them. As this lady drove off, I thought there might be a possibility of them being attacked on the way out. Ali, and I, had a couch by the front door in a position to push it out the door, with the back on the left. We were sitting on the couch, I was closest to the door, with a white cat sitting next to Ali. The tribal guys then started shooting the arrows at the people outside, and shot Ali just below his right knee. It wasn’t too deep, but deep enough. I wanted to break off the point, but Ali went into the bathroom to take care of it himself. I then went to close the door, thinking they wouldn’t (be able to) kill me. After I closed, and dead bolted the door, I saw a space between the door, and wall big enough for a man to put his arm through. The space was black.